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Part 13: Healthy Connect Group Leaders

What is a healthy leader? There are many aspects to it. In the New Testament, Paul writes two letters to Timothy, affectionately called the pastoral letters. If you read 1 Timothy and 2 Timothy and we separate what Paul instructs Timothy to implement in the church and what Paul instructs Timothy to implement in his personal life, you will be pretty surprised. So much of what Paul writes to Timothy is about what he is to implement in his own life as a leader in order for him to be a healthy, growing, strong leader within the church. He deals with Timothy’s devotional life. He deals with his ministry. His relationships with old and young women, men, rich and poor. He speaks about his sexual purity. He addresses his speech! He even tells him about his diet and encourages him to exercise. And he speaks into the area of his emotions and his self-confidence. 


2 Timothy 1:7 says, “God has not given us a spirit to make us fear, but a spirit of power and love”. Some versions say “sound mind”, others say “self-control”, and others say “self-discipline”. I know this is not our favourite word to hear, but a lot of being a healthy leader revolves around self-discipline. Now you will have different areas that are important to you. I will tell you the areas that I feel are important for self-discipline, these are in no particular order. Your devotional life, your emotional life, your relational life, your physical life, your financial life, your sensual life and lastly your vocal life. We have to develop in each of those areas, and the Holy Spirit is in us to help us develop in each of these areas. 

  • Define these areas of discipline in your own life

Now, I’d like to say three things about these areas of discipline. Firstly define what it means in your life. I don’t mean define them like a New Year’s resolution where you’re all motivated, rah, rah, rah. Now I’m going to go do it. Rather in the presence of God, asking the Holy Spirit to lead you and guide you, let Him speak into your heart to define what disciplines need to be there and what those disciplines look like.

  • Don’t rank the disciplines. 

Secondly, don’t rank them. What I mean by that is if you look at these disciplines, you may say surely devotional discipline (My prayer life, worship, Bible Reading). Surely that is more important than physical disciple. Not really. If you are very disciplined in your devotional life but are so physically poor, you can’t even preach for 15 minutes. There’s an obvious problem. You may be relationally brilliant and really disciplined, but financially shocking. There’s a problem! And so don’t rank them and say, “This one’s more important than that one”; just say, “these things are all important. I need to fit them all into my life.” If I find that life is getting tight and I haven’t got time to fit them all in, don’t chop one out; just squeeze the amount of space for each one. Once you develop a discipline, it’s very hard to get it kick-started again if you stop. Whereas if you just compress it, keep it in place, just compress it when your space opens up is so much easier to continue that discipline. 

  • Be Accountable

There needs to be somebody that we are accountable to when it comes to our disciplines. And so the question is this who’s your Paul? So Paul had a very good look at Timothy’s life and was able to write two books on what he needed to implement. Have someone who will look into your life, be that close, be that familiar, that they can write a book and say, this needs to be done, that needs to be done

  • How do you pick yourself up

If you’re leading, and it’s going to happen, you’re going to have times when you feel worn out. You have to figure out for yourself what things will pick you up. I’ve got a couple of things I’ll do if I’m struggling. I immerse myself in his word, not to study not to prepare some to read it. It washes over my soul. I must read a whole book. Secondly, I pick up my guitar and worship, which can be for 5 minutes. It can be for an hour, but I just worship God. The third thing I do is take a walk. Whatever it is to pick you up. 

God never looks for perfection, but rather that we’re healthy. I really hope that God leads you and helps you and that you listen to the Holy Spirit to not just be healthy in the moment but to stay healthy.